Personal Space
Sometimes I wonder how people think these days.
Just a few moments ago a student entered out of the blue to our office and asked where some lab was. That in its self is not a big problem. The way the whole episode went on really bamboozled my brain.
I believe that there is a personal space, call it a bubble if you will that defines the space one occupies. Usually this space is called personal space as in a "no trespassing" sense. yet once in a while you get to meet someone who seems to be oblivious to this concept.
Now back to my case.
The student stood so close to my desk, the only thing going on in my mind at that point was "Too close, too close! Back off! Back off!" I was even leaning away sitting in my chair. A very uncomfortable situation to say the least.
Different culture define personal space very differently. But I think this is a matter of personal preference. The thing is being a person who has a small personal space does not give you the right to invade others' personal space.
I for one have a relatively big personal space bubble and I really feel uneasy when people step inside. Instead of feeling closer to a person, in extreme cases, one feels antagony and resentment towards being put in such an uneasy situation.
11 Comments:
Instead of being nice to the student and frowning in your blog you should have done the opposite!!!
ppl wont respect your bubble unless you force make them
Who said I was nice.
I think my facial expressions showed a clear sense of uneasiness.
After the initial shock,I was not in the mood to give a sermon like I usually do.
You are half japanese: you notice facial expressions.
This student is a full JU student: notices NOTHING.
Get real!!! Facial expressions are way tooo nice for the trash people of your faculty
I think that there is a respect problem in our society in general , body language is very clear , I think that people understand it but igonore it.
however , I dont think that he means to make you uncomfortable , you could have told him.
I do believe the concept of personal space is not yet well adhered in the Jordanian community, not to offend anyone about that matter, but I encounter the same thing everyday, wherever I go and especially at work. People don't understand that you do prefer the distance. I am a person who live in a bubble as well , difference is that I do make it a point when dealing with coworkers, and it paid off... Am labeled "Unfriendly" at work , and I can't care less, as long as I am doing a good job, getting the task done, and having friends who do understand and actually matter is more than enough...
Personal space is not something to be underestimated ...
I do believe you are doing an extraordinary job , and I think your feelings are totally justified ....
trash people??! simaza watch ur words no one gave u the right to trash people!
Well if someone is suppozed to be hurt then let it be the people not the sensei!
It is an interesting issue..
Looking back at it, I can't remember exactly how I learned about personal space, or when did I know such thing existed.
The term itself, I knew about it not so long ago, but of course I have always known that one should keep a certain distance when talking to someone, but it wasn't a rule, more like a natural behaviour.
After living in Japan for almost two years, I missed the different body language we have in Jordan, and the Arab world in general.
Here, you walk as if you ARE in a bubble, which is nice for some time, but then, spending almost one year without hugging anyone was worse than fasting all year long.
I think we need to be somewhere in the middle between Jordan and Japan.. Say India? :)
:wiggles head in agreement:
personal space or social distance here is not an issue in my opinion. Infact I like it more than West/Japan.
I remember one sensei who lived in Egypt 2 years complained about it. She said that after 2 years of not seeing her mother, when they met, they just stood away from each other and waved their hands at each other. This is quite frankly lame.
The major issue I think is respecting privacy. Privacy here is soooooo violated. People peak at what you're reading, they peak at what's on your mobile screen. They stand soooo close even if they don't know you, like what happened to you. etc.
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personal space...のニュアンス、日本語で「個体間距離」。快適に過ごすための他人との個体間距離というのは誰にもあるのですが、それが「近い」か「遠い」という差が人によって違うのですよね。
文化性の差というのもきっとあって、一般的な日本人よりもアラブ社会の個体間距離はぐっと近いなと感じました。異性間では逆に遠くなるのがおもしろいのですが、同性間だと体をつけんばかりに近いですよね。…だんだん慣れてきて、私は全く嫌ではなかったのですが、知らない学生からいきなり近寄られて、私ものけぞってしまったことがあります。
K-s
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